MARRIAGE BITES

What is a marriage (in today’s world)? Is it an institution of supreme sanctity or is it a prison for life sentence? Is it an arrangement to bring order in civilized society or is it an instrument to wreck human psyche? Is there any seriousness left in maintaining the sanctity of marriage or has it become a piece of joke. For me, marriage has been an immense learning experience. It has been a window to look into the mind of a woman. Its almost 2 years of my enlightenment and let me tell you, I’m still getting surprises. Before I took the plunge, I had believed a woman to be an embodiment of sacrifice, selflessness and caretaker of family (don’t be surprised if they are exactly the opposite). I was also fed by media that women were tormented, victims of domestic violence and sufferers at the hands of some male chauvinists (don’t be surprised if exactly the opposite is happening to you). It took me not more than one month of my marriage, when I found myself to be a victim of severe form of verbal abuse at the hands of my wife, to realize how wrong I was. To cut my story short, I have been struggling to bring some order in my marital life but have failed miserably and am left with no option but to severe this relationship.

Viola! another pearl of wisdom for me. I find myself staring at some alphanumeric number IPC 498 A. IPC 498 A is a section under Indian Penal Code that deals with cruelty and dowry related harassments. It is a non-bailable, non compoundable and a cognizant offence. I searched through all my marriage references, bank statements, contacted my parents etc….. when the hell did I take or even demand dowry ??? A little search in the internet cleared the haze surrounding me. IPC 498 A is one of most misused, abused and manhandled law in India. It is blatantly biased towards wives/daughters-in-law and is mostly used as an instrument for blackmail, harassment and settlement of personal score. For, unlike any other law, the accused is guilty until proven innocent and can be arrested without any investigation. (Please see, the accused can be anyone, husband, husband’s relatives, friends or any stranger on the road). There are more than 50,000 IPC 498 A cases till last year and given by the statistics of 2% conviction rate, it is very much evident that most of the cases are false. The reality finally dawned on me. Being caught in a bad marriage in India, is not my destiny, but a criminal offence and am faced with indiscriminate choices.

Should I serve the life sentence of marriage or should I go through the rigmarole of 498 A trial?

Should I psychologically wreck myself in marriage or in the fight for justice (498 A)?

This is what marriage was meant to be????… A PIECE OF JOKE in the hands of unscrupulous women.

12:43 PM - Monday, October 10, 2005 - post comment

A woman against 498A

I am a woman whose family has been trapped in this unbelievably unjust law. After the initial shock about how anybody can do such a thing to innocent people.. we now know firsthand that there are some Indian women whose hearts are very very dark. You read about these things and you think that these things happen only to "others" .......and then one day the police arrives at your doorstep.

Every single day I pray for justice, I pray for our misery to end, I pray for their punishment. But days are going by and there's no end in sight.

When I see the countless number of people who were killed in the recent indo-pak earthquake, I wonder why so many innocent people are dead when the evil ones are going scot free..It just doesn't add up...

I am not very religious but I do strongly believe that if there is a god then he WILL punish them. It may take time but it WILL happen one day. Till then we have to soldier on. In the meantime, those of us who are residing in other countries should try to get citizenships in those countries and try to get our families out of india.

I was a huge believer in indian culture and values till the false 498A was foisted on us. It has made me realise that India is a country were the laws are for supporting crooks, liars and abominable people.

Anonymous - 3:10 PM - Monday, October 10, 2005

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They think we can't speak

Great Effort Wasif, Congratulations.

You have to fearlessly speak up against the gross injustice, as more and more of innocents indian families are forced to be victims of the infamous IPC Section 498A.

You are not alone. There are so many wasif's waiting to breathe. Every drop contributes to the ocean. and this Lull is all before the storm that we will create to eradicate the injustice that has forced the land to be corrupt.

Welcome to blogging,

Jinesh Zaveri.

Anonymous - 5:34 PM - Monday, October 10, 2005

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Untitled Comment

Wasif,

I sympathize with you that you and your family had to go through this horrific trauma especially when you wholeheartedly hoped that your marriage would be a success. Gone are the days when women were revered for their sanctity and sacrificial attitude. Now women have not only realised their innate potential to be equal to men but also conspired to be able to control men. Its disheartening to believe that Government is still under the spell of the false belief that women are a weaker sex in India and needs legal and social protection. Women have managed to craftily conspire to transform our very culture for their savage benefits which will devastate the Indian family. Unaware of the potential vulnerability that men are facing now, Indian Government and Media are busy extravagantly glorifying women in the name of Women's empowerment program which is of a revengeful nature.

http://presentindia.blogspot.com/2005/10/present-india.html

We all wish that today's men wake up from their sleep and unite to protect the very foundation of Indian Family before its too late. Women have already gone too far to destroy it and gain strategic control over our life.
We must unite and protest against this injustice. We must fight for our rights.
We must believe that our first target is Media. Media is following the orders for bombarding the indian society with constant and consistent hammering that women are always right, perfect and ideal for economic and social progress and all men are subordinate to them. Media is the culprit and must be stopped before its too late to repair the damage. Raise your voice and protest against the way women and men are shown on Media.

Anonymous - 7:16 AM - Tuesday, October 11, 2005

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good Wajid

Wajid

I am with u .. shibu .. Let's keep meeting .. on staurdays to discuss furher course of action .. Same problem everywhere

Anonymous - 9:40 AM - Thursday, November 3, 2005

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